So, what does a teacher really do?
For parents who were reluctantly thrown into the world of “distance learning” last year, here’s a remediation of what your kids’ teacher really does
For a year and a half now, pestilence has swept the planet and changed the lives of its 7.8 billion or so inhabitants. The buzzword early on was “new norms.” The language has now evolved, or devolved, into vax vs. unvax war cries. (A topic for another essay).
In 2020, this scourge vaulted us into a bizarre, almost fictional survival mode of isolation and meal delivery. We became obsessive-compulsive with sanitizers (something akin to Lady Macbeth’s Act V cryptic sleepwalk “Out, damned spot!”). Survivalists hoarded enough pallets of toilet paper to last a millennium. Surgical masks became omnipresent, even while outdoors (creating very strange tan lines) and, for the most risible reasons, inside the car. To this day, many still avoid each other at tackling distance.
Teaching and Distance Learning
Isolation also plunged parents of school-age children into everyone’s worst nightmare … distance learning. Or another way of thinking about it is “teaching with a megaphone from atop Mt. Fuji.” Along with the arduous task of caring for their children 24/7, parents were forced reluctantly into a partnership with teachers. Thus, they were required to learn a Brave
It (distance learning) also provided parents a Zoom’s-eye view of what teachers do. And they discovered something we (teachers) have known all along: they can’t do it.
New World with codified language, including eClass and virtual classroom. It also provided parents a Zoom’s-eye view of what teachers do. And they discovered something we (teachers) have known all along: they can’t do it.
Fortunately, today, most students have returned to the classroom, thereby relieving parents of this Godawful duty. So this essay is a primer for parents who were mystified the first time around … so what does a teacher really do?
Teacher (no, “educator”)
First, the title. ''Teacher'' comes from the Proto-Germanic word *taikijan,” which meant ''to show.” From there, follow the etymology through Merriam-Webster, or Oxford. But there’s so much more to the teaching than the literal definition. Public perceptions run from thoughtful admiration to abject cluelessness.
Think of it this way: “A teacher is (a) __________.” (you fill in the blank). I’ve seen thousands of sweet, caring teacher testimonials on happy posters, plastic apples, mini placards, coffee mugs and Hallmark cards. (We’d prefer a pay raise over accolades, but that also is the topic of another essay). Typically there’s a heart emoji involved.
But in recent years another, more sanitized label emerged: “educator,” a euphemism for anyone in the profession. I consider it an unnecessary abstraction but have learned to live with it.
Mini-Lesson: A euphemism is a mild, indirect or benign word or phrase that takes the place of a harsher, more blunt meaning. Thus, a stripper is an “exotic dancer” … or “previously-owned transportation” instead of used cars. See, you learned something today.
I shall, in 2,000 words or less (“fewer?”), describe the job broken down into individual responsibilities. First, how to teach, or cognitive science.
Cognition (How to teech)
This depends on many things, including age, learning levels and preferences, reading skills, thought processes, linguistics, comprehension, experience … well, you get the idea. Let’s start with Bloom’s Taxonomy, a cognitive framework used by teachers for generations.
Here’s what it looks like …
Bloom’s Taxonomy is the Bible, the Koran, the Tanakh, the alpha and omega of teaching. Each lesson is assumed to include Mr. Bloom’s methodology, and is crafted to one or more of these categories, preferably in left to right progression.
Of course, there are a lot of things to consider … the topic, education level, student ability, etc. But Bloom’s Taxonomy is inherent to the process. Yes, this is at a granular level, but you get the picture.
Every teacher gets a copy of Bloom’s scripture and an accompanying 500 page instructional manual on how to apply it. Then the teacher spends much of his/her spare life over the next 10 months laboring and planning with Mr. Bloom.
Lesson Planning
To make the whole process easier (sarcasm alert), each district adopts its own learning standards, watermarks of achievement, for every grade level. The standards are the objective(s) of any lesson. So, in formulaic format, lesson planning looks something like this …
Grade Level + Topic + Bloom ÷ Standard (~40) x # of classes + (Strategy + resources) x activities ÷ Assessment x Teacher Time100 = Genius!
Got that? To simplify (more sarcasm) it even further, administrators now demand “differentiation,” ** the further cleaving of individual lessons according to each student’s learning ability.
Translation: You now need to individualize, or customize, lessons for each student. So, in a typical class of 30 you might be teaching differently to five exceptional students, five above average, 10 average, five who are “challenged” and five who are gazing out the window or buried in their cellphones.
** Understand that education, like the military, has a 500 page glossary of jargon, definitions and acronyms that must be memorized and expertly applied.
Administrators revel in this soul-sucking process, as they do in “data driven” assessments (parsed test results), which includes a tedious group exercise demanding your precious planning time to figure out what you did wrong in testing. Keep in mind, these administrators are the same people who expertly apply doublespeak; they demand rigor in the classroom from one side of the mouth, but “pass them” from the other.
So, planning lessons is basically a prescription for the 5 W’s of your daily activity. There’s no definitive lesson plan … it can be as general or specific as you are so inclined.
I always looked at it as a script, divided into 15-minute segments of activities and tasks, all neatly designed to keep students engaged (that is, when they’re not sleeping or on their cellphones). Copies of your lesson plans are then forwarded in advance to the eagerly-anticipating administrator, who promptly plants them in their files without ever looking at them.
The Classroom
Classrooms are typically colorful, pleasant, inviting places, gaily decorated with learning posters, alphabets, poignant sayings, apple graphics and furnished by neatly-aligned rows of desks or tables, cabinets, shelves, computers, etc. Science rooms typically are more expansive, with all the equipment of a functional lab.
Most teachers have mounds of materials on hand -- assorted pens, pencils, markers, paper, notebooks, etc. -- because regardless of the number of $250 Jordans that enter the room, half of the students (especially the boys) will not possess a 50-cent pen.
Oh, the teacher usually purchases these items at his/her own expense.
Desks are arranged in a variety of ergonomic patterns to fit the parameters of the room. More and more teachers are utilizing six-seat tables, presumably to facilitate group activities.
Classes usually start with a “bellringer” activity, a mini-lesson or exercise intended to get the cognitive juices flowing. Bellringers can be something as simple as unpacking a word definition, a quick review/assessment of the previous day, or a writing prompt. Then, depending on the objective (read: standard), the lesson begins.
Because subjects are so diverse and distinct, a variety of strategies are employed … usually some variance between show and tell. Most adults envision some form of lecture preceding learning/working.
Two things to keep in mind:
1) Lectures in public schools are considered taboo because the average student possesses the attention span of your average guppy. Within minutes students will be face-down in their phones, daydreaming, talking or snoring.
2) Worksheets also are a “no-no;”they are the lazy-man’s transcription for cognition. No, there are better ways of student “engagement” (another term from the voluminous educator glossary somehow involving Mr. Bloom).
The trick is to make learning fun, engaging (there’s that word again), physical and mental movement, or anything under the sun to trigger critical thinking. The teacher’s “style” is intricately involved. Some, like me, resort to acting,
The trick is to make learning fun, engaging (there’s that word again), physical and mental movement, or anything under the sun to trigger critical thinking.
dramatization, impassioned histrionics, mania, mobility, gesticulation … and a very loud voice. (That sometimes happens when you teach Shakespeare) “Proximity” is useful … you don’t have to say anything to negate wayward behavior. Just stand next to the guilty student, and the offense usually stops.
The most confounding aspect of technology in the classroom is that half the texts students receive are from their parents. (angry emoji!)
Contemporary M.O. now divides activities into 15-minute increments; in other words, lessons are fashioned in short spurts to accommodate fragmented attention spans and hopefully discourage the modern student habit of engaging Social Media or commonplace texting.
The most confounding part of technology in the classroom is that half the texts students receive are from their parents.
This is where classroom management comes into play. Classroom management is simply a euphemism for controlling classroom behavior. A competent teacher establishes control starting Day 1 and consistently maintains his/her rules throughout the year. Really, it’s no different for you as parents. Levels of risk/reward are deployed, hopefully without prejudice.
Honestly, the vast majority of students prefer systemic structure. They quickly become aware of when their classmates are wasting their time with distractions or misbehavior, and universally prefer discipline over disorder.
Students
There is no point dwelling on archetypal students. Every teacher receives a whole group of new students every year (from 30 in elementary school to 125-150 in high school), and their personalities, learning abilities, maturity levels, home environments, hormonal levels, social behaviors and daily moods are as varied as fingerprints.
Yes, your kid is “special” in his/her own way. But just take a moment and think … a teacher is dealing with legions of “special” adolescents every … single … day. Take your feelings about parenting your kids and multiply them by a factor of 150 … that is the job of a teacher.
But just take a moment and think … a teacher is dealing with legions of “special” adolescents every … single … day. Take your feelings about parenting your kids and multiply them by a factor of 150 … that is the job of a teacher.
Is now the time to talk about pay raises?
A Calling
(serious time … mostly)
Unfortunately, because of social circumstances, sometimes a teacher is the only stable adult a child will see all day. Comes with the territory.
Combine that with the physically, mentally and emotionally draining requirement of perpetual attentiveness, an unrelenting drive to perform at the highest level every day, time-consuming and oft-times frustrating staff and grade-level curriculum meetings which could have been covered via email, scarfing a Top Ramen lunch in 20 minutes, sacrificing weekends and personal life to grade 100+ essays over a weekend, and arriving at work every day with a smile, uninhibited energy, a positive attitude and supportive mindset … therein is the life of a teacher. (Have I brought up the topic of pay grade?)
I changed vocations at mid-life, at age 48, to become a teacher. Prior to that I was a journalist, writer, P.R. executive for a professional sports franchise, publisher, communications consultant and freelance flak (slang for P.R. consultant). All were challenging, all were satisfying and rewarding in their own way.
But nothing compares to teaching, in difficulty, effort and incontrovertible reward. Nothing. Not even close. There’s an old saying that stubbornly persists today: “Those who can, do; those who can't, teach” from George Bernard Shaw's 1905 stage play Man and Superman.
With all due respect to the inimitable Scot, whose talent with the written word was unassailable, he was dead, flat wrong. However, there’s another old saying which is an immutable truth: teaching is definitely a “calling,” a conviction of almost divine influence, where the motivation and reward far transcend public perception or monetary value.
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Dedicated to all teachers, whose selflessness, dedication and caring will always hold a place dear to my heart.