Laugh more, worry less
Life can be funny everywhere you look.
Way back when as I was preparing to make my first ever public speaking appearance — before the La Mesa (CA) Lions Club, if memory serves — I nervously paced around my Padres office at Jack Murphy Stadium contemplating what I was going to say. And trying not to throw up.
Sitting and watching me fret was the late, great major league baseball umpire Ed Runge.** Ed was a silver-haired, leathery septuagenarian with a hawkish face that must have scared the piss out of any rookie who stepped into the batter’s box when he was calling balls and strikes in the 50s and 60s.
But Ed was a gentle soul in his sundown years. He was amused by my angst — he’d sat through a thousand “rubber chicken” dinners before making his presentation of humorous stories and anecdotes from his baseball career. Without a hint of a smile, he offered the following advice:
“Whatever you do don’t try to be charming, witty or intelligent … just be yourself.”
It took a second for the gentle put-down to sink in. Then I laughed out loud. The tension was broken.
A tiny life lesson from a spontaneous moment. But an important one.
** The San Diego Padres paid Ed Runge specifically to spread goodwill in the community on behalf of the team. I was his “boss,” meaning I booked all of his appearances, even though I was young enough to be his grandson.
Live in the moment
When I started this space two years ago, I wrote a piece called “Life Lessons.” That treatise was directed toward young men half my age about being true to virtues like Honesty, Temperament and Personal Responsibility. Those were “Big Think” concepts, core values I hoped would help them navigate life and be decent human beings.
Life Lessons was serious, didactic and frankly, a bit preachy.
But I have realized there’s equal value in life’s little things, like living in the moment, experiencing the here and now, and not regretting the past or fretting about the future. “Big Think” is important. But so are ephemeral moments, like spontaneous laughter, which briefly jolt us from the stresses and drollery of everyday life. These mental checkpoints are way overlooked and severely undervalued.
We’re allowed about 80 years, more or less, on this planet. I’ll bet if you stop, look around and chuckle now and then, it will be a much more pleasant journey.
It doesn’t take much effort to see life’s funny side.
Just look … it’s all around you.
Street Signs
Occasionally the freeway monitors and construction crews throw out little gems that remind us that boiling behind the wheel in traffic is a feckless and unnecessary expense of energy.
I wear normal Fruit-of-the-Loom undies, but I’d still probably honk. And I do worry about the Zombie Apocalypse.
Then there are the marquees with philosophical messages …
And if you’re driving in the Australian outback, just remember …
Finally, if you are like many guys and don’t want to do the flowers and chocolate thing for Valentine’s Day, you might offer her something a little different. Consider this handmade sign, courtesy of Conan the Barbarian …
Sandwich Boards
Sometimes restauranteurs offer more than daily specials…
Always read the label
This sweater label looks perfectly normal … until you get to No. 7.
OK, we know not to drink and drive. But this beer maker offers an extra exclamation point!
Church Signs
Nobody gets double-takes better than churches. They’re great at witticisms, puns and verbal irony on behalf of Jesus.
And if you don’t notice them, well, Satan might be sitting on your shoulder ...
“Heh … heh … heh … “
Perhaps Pastor Myers’ message is … um … open to interpretation?
Fortune Cookies
Most of the world’s supply of fortune cookies is made in the United States. Wonton Food, Inc., in Brooklyn, churns out 4.5 million per day, about three billion annually. (Ironically, fortune cookies don’t exist in China).
Messages are mostly inane, empty platitudes about life. But sometimes they’re pretty witty.
Witness this one about self-discovery …
Then again, your future could be deflating …
And a reminder … don’t look up ….
I really wish I’d written this one …
Headlines
Remember when as host of The Tonight Show Jay Leno featured a funny weekly bit called “Headlines?” Well, newspapers are slowly dying out but there are still editors out there who can make us do the “slow blink” of disbelief.
Here’s a few …
Sometimes the layout and design editors are just a bit tone deaf …
No wonder there are so many cold cases …
And finally, it’s settled
This has been posted before, but in case you still didn’t know …
… it’s true.
###
Jim Geschke was inducted into the prestigious Marquis Who’s Who Registry in 2021.
Funny stuff, Jim! Those highway and church signs made me think of a couple '60s-era "Dad jokes" when my bro and I were around 10 or so: The "Zombies Ahead" sign reminded me of long vacation drives we used to take, with Dad driving, Mom in front passenger seat, and Clint and I in back. With carefully-chosen inflections to maximize the funny, Dad would announce, "What's that in the road...........a head?!" Of course, we'd look, without fail (and of course, laugh hysterically)!
When driving through Houston, back in the day (with us in tow), when we'd pass a school for the blind with its attendant nearby signs that said, "Watch For the Blind," Dad wondered aloud: "I wonder if, at the School for the Hearing-Impaired, they have signs that say, 'Listen For the Deaf'." Clint and I were living in a sitcom...............thankfully!
Thanks for the chuckles today!